i guess when i come to emotional times in my life i turn to music. i used to be able to write things (poetry and diary entries) and that could express it all, but i don't really feel like venting that way. so i'm finding a lot of comfort in music. and i highly reccommend it. but, in a way i highly condem it, because it's like cards. and i'm not talking about playing cards anymore, i'm talking about Hallmark cards. those over-priced stupid things that people buy because they can't think of something to write themselves, they have to let someone else say it, and then claim it was the "perfect" card. ugh. yea, perfect for 3 zillion other people, why else would it even be on the shelf? granted, a lot of cards are really stupid that they sell, and, as well, there are a lot of cards that i've received from people that have made me cry and laugh, and really have been "perfect." anyway, i won't hate you if you buy me a card. i'd really enjoy it if people would send me cards or letters. or money. but i digress...

music has helped me, and other people have written some things that equate how i feel.

can the child within my heart rise above? can i sail though the changing ocean tides? can i handle the seasons of my life? well i've been afraid of changing 'cause i built my life around you. but time makes you older, children get older, i'm getting older too.

she needs wide open spaces, room to make a big mistake. she needs new faces. she knows the highest stakes.