For bicycle riders:

1. If you’re going to ride on the sidewalk, don’t be a dick and use the 3 inches of space on either side of me to speed past, nearly killing me. Instead, understand that you are officially a part of pedestrian traffic (hence the f’ing SIDEWALK) and pedal cautiously around pedestrians. Or buy a bell. Or just holler, “Hey. Move or else I’ll hit you because I’m a dick on a bike using the sidewalk.”

2. If you’re going to ride on the street, then you legally must obey all traffic signs. I’m pretty sure that’s how it works. Therefore, at a four-way intersection that has two stop signs and you happen to be at one of them, you better stop for me if I’m driving, or else I’m going to run over your sorry ass with my car.